So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
