Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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