I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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