Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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