You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
