I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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