we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
