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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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