Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
