Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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