: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
