If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Randomize