Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
