I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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