Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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