i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
