So drunk its hurt
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
When are your genitals available?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
