addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
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