I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Randomize
