we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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