is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
