my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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