He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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