i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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