Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
