do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
