My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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