Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
