she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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