If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Randomize
