I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
