Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
