Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
