oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize