He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
