She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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