He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize