So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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