This is not my ceiling
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize