dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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