We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
