On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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