does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
