you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
A bitchslap is in order.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
