Tell her she can't have a vagina
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
