Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize