I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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