uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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