He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
