she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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