CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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