Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
